Asking for Help is Not a Sign of Weakness
You’re Not Alone
By Rod Macdonald, Certified Coach Practitioner and Tonic’s Resident Coach
Q: “I’m a 49-year-old man and feel like I am suffering in silence. Why don’t I ask for help?”
-Monte
A: Monte, you don’t mention what it is you are dealing with, so if you need immediate support, I encourage you to contact a crisis hotline local to where you are. In Ontario, you can call “ConnexOntario” for support with mental health and addiction at 1-866-531-2600. If it is not in that realm, keep reading. The “suffering,” as you called it, may be something that you are trying to get past, trying to get through, or trying to get started doing.
As a broad generalization, men are particularly vulnerable to the feeling that we have to deal with our challenges alone. This is programming that is often instilled at an earlier point of our lives and working with a psychologist or other mental health professional may be helpful. Otherwise, you can acknowledge the limiting belief that you have, and choose a better belief to focus on. This is something we do as coaches; support clients to recognize where they are, and help them get to where they want to be. Here are some beliefs that you may consider going forward:
- It is okay that I don’t know everything; no one does.
- I am learning and growing every day, even when things don’t go the way I want.
- When I ask for help, it is a sign of strength.
- I am better when I receive help, because I achieve my goals sooner and easier.
Whatever you are dealing with, the truth is that neither men nor women need to suffer in silence. We will all face challenges and history shows us that it is possible to overcome almost anything. History also shows that facing challenges with support is easier, takes less time, and results in a better outcome. You are facing a challenge, but you don’t have to face it alone.
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Combining over 30 years in the field of self-development, Rod is the CEO of the Certified Coaches Federation, one of the largest coach education companies in the world, and a speaker, coach and author. For more information on the Certified Coaches Federation, visit www.certifiedcoachesfederation.com
Want to ask Tonic’s Coach a question? Send a brief email to rod@certifiedcoachesfederation.com describing your challenge in 50 words or less, and one question will be selected per issue.
